


I need you to run to me

by ElephantOfAfrica



Series: Total Recall AU [1]
Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Confused Graves, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, I apologize for this garbage, I hope you like trash cause that's what this is, Light Angst, M/M, Mpreg, Total Recall AU, colin pull up your sweatpants man, it's temporary tho, you'll get my meaning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-16 01:26:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10561058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElephantOfAfrica/pseuds/ElephantOfAfrica
Summary: Total Recall no magic AU: Percival Graves has a steady job on the other side of the world, it's kind of tedious and boring but it provides enough for him to sleep soundly beside his husband every night. Newt Graves owns the last animal sanctuary on earth with his brother. Their lives are monotonous, but happy.But with rising threats, constant unrest, and endless crackdowns by the UFB, things might just tip over into chaos.---Basically, the consequences of blissful ignorance are a thing Percival should have braced for.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> BOY AM I RUSTY the last time i wrote and posted something was in 2010 holy shit who would have thought that the idea to get me out of my eternal writing hibernation would be this piece of shit writing right here not me no sir  
> I have also started writing something just before I wrote this, it's also in fbawtft fandom, based on an idea I saw on sozdanie-gryazi-eternal's tumblr that just jumped right into my brain and made a nest for itself there. It's an AU were David from The Lobster is Percival's twin, so yeah that's happening. Look out for it maybe?!  
> I may have fallen in love with the cyberpunk vibe of Total Recall, I thought the movie, while clichéd, was very entertaining (I hadn't seen the original and I could tell what would happen every step of the way, that's how clichéd it is lol). I was completely terrified of Kate Beckinsale the entire time, she just did not stop! I also love that they portrayed England as the devil, because it is.... or maybe I'm just forever bitter about colonialism. What I hated was that the leader of the resistance was a white American, but that's hollywood for ya. Anyway, this isn't about the movie, just the general premise of it, so on with the show. (Although if someone wants to chat movies with me I'd be delighted)  
> No beta so far. Please point out any mistakes.  
> Hope you enjoy.

* * *

He was sitting at a small, grey, round table across from Newt, an overhead light hung above them casting their features in harsh contrast. Percival, once again tried to make out anything beyond them but it was too dark to even tell what color walls surround them. Newt always looked the same at this table, shadows under his eyes, hair messy as usual, but the spark of life in his eyes always burned bright. Sometimes Percival looked at the table they sat at, at the chairs, and he doesn’t find them familiar, they’re not the table and chairs in their apartment for sure. But usually he just enjoys the conversation with Newt who talks with passion and urgency, he never touches Percival, never even tries to reach out, but that’s okay, Percival never felt alarmed by that. The thing was, he could never remember what the conversations were about when he wakes up. He remembered the way Newt looked, the tone of his voice, the table they sat at, but he was never able to recollect any part of what Newt said in the dream.

His ‘Newt Dream’ it was dubbed by the man himself when Percival told him about the recurring dream, which- well, Newt was never the best at picking names, so Percival should not have been surprised by the lack of creativity, but he was amused.

His husband teased him at first about wanting to see him so much that he started dreaming of him, but with every time Percival told him he’d been visited by ‘Dream Newt’, the man started getting less amused and more worried, felt guilty even for not spending as much time with Percival as he used to- due to their jobs, but Newt’s work in particular as owner and manager of the only animal sanctuary on the island made his hours irregular and long- which ultimately led to Newt, painstakingly, assigning Theseus to share a bit more of his work load so he could come home when Percival did and they’d be able to spend time together. Which of course led to a couple of weeks at the start of this arrangement of very _athletic_ and fulfilling evenings, which in turn, led them to where they are now.

  
It was just past lunch time at the factory that Percival heard his phone beep with a message notification, the noise penetrating through the monotony of the sounds of the factory. He flicked a look at Tina in the station beside him, she was engrossed in her own Synth inspection and humming to herself, it didn’t sound like anything he recognized but sometimes she’ll introduce him to her music against his will. He perked up at the smallest hint of a distraction though, so he reached into his pocket for the small device as he sent away the Synth he just finished inspecting. The message was from Theseus and Percival's mood instantly brightened even before he opened the message. Theseus usually sent him pictures at random times of day of Newt doing things and it always brought a smile to his face. He knew that Theseus knew how mind numbing his work could be, so far from the exciting work of the keepers of the only animal sanctuary left in the world.

  
But as Percival opened the message his brows knitted in disappointment at the lack of pictures, then he was biting his bottom lip in worry.

  
_[Sent Newt home. It's nothing serious but he wasn't feeling well. He told me not to tell you so don't rush home or he'll know and I'll never hear the end of it.]_

  
Percival pursed his lips and put away his phone, frown fully in place, if Theseus was trying to be humorous then it really wasn't serious but he still sent Newt home, and the fact that Newt actually complied means that he must have been having a tough time today. Percival's stomach roiled with worry, Newt’s health has been up and down recently, well ever since they received the shocking news of Newt’s pregnancy but it’s been extra rocky since he’s hit the last trimester; his back always giving out, his feet hurt too much, and getting dizzy. They were told it was Newt’s blood pressure and that he needed to be more careful. Percival has been plying Newt with as much good and nutritious food as he could get his hands on at the island, it was tough but he managed.

The pregnancy- it wasn’t supposed to happen, it was a complete accident. They’ve been married seven years, dated for two before that, and they never once felt that they wanted a child, they were happy and content with being just a family of two, well two humans and one cat. Then Newt got sick, and stayed sick, so a trip to their local medical center revealed this life changing news. They went home in a daze, each going through his own mental spiral. That night Newt cuddled up to him, closely, his hold on Percival almost scared; they hadn’t said anything to each other since the doctor’s announcement but at this moment it seemed their words wanted to bubble over and they spewed out thoughts and ideas, disorganized and nervous, but they talked at any rate. And they kept talking about it for days, separating in the morning as each went about their day then came back together in the afternoon and picked up the conversation like it never stopped. Two weeks had gone by before they made the decision to go through with it and a few weeks more before they told their friends and Percival was so grateful to be following Newt on this, he didn’t know if he could lead the charge on this particular life task.

Percival forced himself to take some deep breaths and get back to his tasks, wishing the day to be over already so he could go home and check on Newt himself. He managed to listen to Tina talk  about her decision to just stay with Queenie and Jacob at their place instead of live alone, and he let the easy lilt of her voice wash over him for as long as possible, he barely hmm’d and nodded at the appropriate junctions but Tina didn’t seem to notice. At the end of the work day he was quiet and tense as he changed out of his jumpsuit and back into his clothes. 

  
He even missed Tina talking to him as he headed out until she was tugging at his sleeve, "Hey, did you hear, Barry said there’s going to be some kind of evaluation tomorrow, from the government! What’s up with that?”

Percival hummed; gaze still unfocused ahead, not really listening, “Good.”

Tina made a face at that, “Good?!” she shook her head, “What's gotten into you today?" she arched a brow and kept with his pace easily.

  
"Newt's not feeling well," he said quietly with a frown, not wanting to beat around the bush, knowing Tina will understand. She's been his closest friend for years.

  
Tina frowned, "What's wrong with him?" she asked worriedly.

  
Percival sighed and pushed his hands into his pockets, "I don't know, but it doesn't seem to be serious, Theseus just said that he sent him home early today."

  
Tina was quiet for a moment, "Oh. I guess it can't be that bad if you didn't rush out earlier huh?!" she sounded unconvinced though and Percival winced slightly, wondering if he should have asked to leave early despite what Theseus said. He's not a very good husband, he thought, and his stomach dropped with worry and fear again, making him quiet for the rest of his and Tina's trek out of the factory and all the way to the Fall.

While the UFB station is all white, smooth, and high tech holoscreens everywhere- alternating between advertising the latest in phone implants that nobody Percival knows can afford, and news reports about the latest terrorist attack and the Chancellor’s response- the island station is the sharp and gritty counterpoint. Grey walls decorated with graffiti and art instead of the army of holoscreens, sure there are some for official use but not like the offensive magnitude of the other station. Additionally, police and synth presence is much heavier than in the UFB station- arrests happen every day at the island station with everyone steering clear of the scene but not stopping either, no one stops; they keep their heads down and keep going.

  
Tina didn't try to engage him in conversation again and he was thankful to her for picking up on his desire to be quiet and alone with his thoughts, but she walked with him and sat herself beside him in the cabin anyway, an unobtrusive source of comfort.

  
Percival almost couldn't stand the hour it took to commute back, he had probably bitten his bottom lip raw with all the worrying he did and only noticed how hard he was shaking his leg when Tina clutched his knee hard to bring it to a stop, "Calm down," her voice was firm, "he's probably just tired, you know how it can be sometimes."

  
Percival nodded once and let out a long exhale, "Yeah...you're probably right," he said with a low voice, staring at his knees.

  
He heard Tina whistle, "Wow! I cannot beli- Percival Graves just admitted that I'm right! I have to tell everybody, you said I was right and you were wrong,"

  
"Come on I didn't say I was wrong," he tried.

  
Tina talked over him, "I’m telling everyone. You’re done, it’s over for you..." there was no stopping Tina now he knew, but he allowed himself a small smile at the ridiculous display. Tina was just as bad at comforting anyone as he was but he appreciated her trying anyway, he knew how awkward it felt not being able to say or do the right thing for someone he cared about that needed it.

  
They were only a minute away from reaching the station and Tina had already started telling him exactly how she would ruin his reputation through the fact that he had admitted that someone else was right.

  
By the time they made it out of the station and into the busy streets of their city Tina had moved on to gossip her sister had picked up two days ago from Mrs. Esposito who lived down the hall from them.

  
While Percival didn't contribute to the gossip, as he barely knew the people Tina was talking about, it did do its job in making their trip seem shorter and before they knew it they were saying their goodbyes as they headed their separate ways home. 

  
He quickened his step now, halting momentarily at a kiosk to get a small bag of candies that Newt liked but rarely bought for himself.

  
Percival was filled with nervous energy as he stepped into the elevator, barely greeting his neighbors and then almost sprinting out of the elevator when it reached his floor.

  
With a swipe of his palm across the pad on the door he was finally home. The door swished closed behind him and he noted the dim lighting, his heart beat fast as he stepped into the kitchen area, finding their ginger cat, Pickett, up on the counter again, he didn't bother putting him down, just scratched its head and went further into the apartment and his heart almost leapt into his throat when he saw Newt already blinking his eyes open in bed.

  
"Hey," Percival's voice came out soft and he stepped closer, minding the steps that separated the kitchen area from the rest of the apartment.

  
"I didn't mean to fall asleep," Newt's voice was scratchy with sleep and he started pushing himself up.

  
"No, no, hey, don't... get up," Percival trailed off in defeat because Newt had already pushed himself, with apparent difficulty, into a sitting position and turned, getting his feet on the floor, back to Percival, arms braced behind him for balance and breathed heavily.

  
Percival swallowed thickly and moved quickly across the room, got on the bed and slid into place behind Newt who instantly leaned back into Percival, taking the strain off his back.

  
Newt sighed deeply, Percival started rubbing his belly through his shirt slowly and kissed Newt's cheek, "What happened?" his voice soft.

  
Newt's annoyed groan answered him and Percival held back a relieved sigh, it wasn't serious after all.

  
"I told him not to tell. Can't follow simple instruction that one. It was nothing." Newt huffed in annoyance.

  
"Why didn't you want me to know if it was nothing?" Percival tried to keep the smile from his voice.

  
"Because I knew you'd either run back here or spend the day worrying, which you did, didn't you?" Newt accused, face turned to look at Percival.

  
Percival finally allowed himself to smile, "Of course I did," he slid his arms around Newt, one across his chest and the other around his stomach, he leaned in, their lips faintly touching, teasingly close, he could hear and feel Newt's choked breath just before they closed the distance between them.

  
The kiss was soft and sweet as they said _hello_ and _I missed you_ , turned leisurely; long and deep. Percival's arms tightened around Newt, and Newt brought a hand to the back of Percival's head, holding gently and scratching his hair. Their lips slid gently against each other and when Newt moaned Percival pulled back slowly, catching Newt with his eyes still closed for a second and he imprinted the view into his mind as hard as he could, cataloging the sweet redness of Newt's lips, the blush bringing out his freckles, messy hair, Newt’s eyes opened, gaze soft, and Percival loved him so much he could hardly breathe sometimes.

  
Percival stretched up and pressed a kiss to Newt's forehead, "So what happened?" he asked softly.  
Newt's gaze slid away again with a sigh, he shrugged, "Nothing, I got tired. My back just...didn't want to carry me today," he tried humor.

  
Percival frowned at the side of Newt's head, "Maybe you should stay off your feet now," in the privacy of his own mind, Percival knew he was afraid of suggesting bed rest to Newt who could not fathom a day off from his work even if it was necessary, he'd gone to his animals with dizzying fevers before, to Percival's horror and Theseus's annoyance, they couldn't even make him leave then. But the fact that Newt came home today gave the hope that maybe he understood that cutting back is required now, because it wasn't just his health on the line, and that made Percival think he might have a chance with suggesting more rest.

  
Newt was quiet though, then he sighed and dropped his head back onto Percival's shoulder, "I don't like it," he still clung to the desire to be up and about with his animals, doing the work he loved so much.

  
"I know," Percival murmured, bent his head down to lay kisses on the side of Newt's neck. He was letting Newt reach the inevitable conclusion on his own now.

  
Newt tilted his head minutely, letting Percival access more skin, "But I can't really work for half an hour without falling over myself and panting like I ran around the island three times," he was annoyed now and Percival obviously wasn't doing a good job relaxing him.

  
He tugged Newt's wide shirt collar to one side, exposing a collar bone and part of his shoulder, and continued his kissing down there until he felt Newt deflate, shoulders sagging, "Alright, I suppose Theseus will have to do without me for a little bit," defeat was clear in his voice and it tugged painfully at Percival's heart. He wanted Newt healthy but he also didn't want him to be miserable.

  
He looked up at Newt, brought a hand up to his cheek, and touched his thumb to Newt's lower lip, "You know they'll all be alright, you taught Theseus and Jacob well. And when you miss them we can go visit, you just won't be doing any of the work," of course he folded like a bad poker hand. One look at those sad eyes brought him to his knees, he was never stern with Newt, could never hope to be, he'd tried at first but it never stuck and Newt surely softened up all his sharp edges over the years that followed, at least in regards to him.

  
Newt nodded, a hint of sadness still in his eyes, so Percival did the only thing he could think of to get Newt's mind off his inevitable time off, he started rubbing Newt's shoulders. He pressed and stroked deeply to get rid of the ache of the day and Newt almost instantly groaned in satisfaction.  
Percival smiled to himself and moved the massage down the tense back, muscles loosening, and Newt's relieved noises were quite obscene, "God, yes, thank you." his words breathy, stretched out on a moan and trailed off on a sigh.

  
It was only a few quiet minutes before Newt was tugging sluggishly at whatever part of Percival he could reach, and Percival paused, waiting for instructions.

  
"Lie down with me," Newt whispered, apparently too relaxed to be any louder.

  
Percival instantly moved back to give Newt space to get back into bed, helped him a bit by keeping him balanced with a hand on his back or elbow, until he was under the covers. He then turned to himself; he realized he still had his boots on, he frowned. He kicked off his boots and wiped off any dirt that got on their blanket, made a mental note to clean it tomorrow, then quickly stripped off his clothes, folded them hastily and deposited them on the floor beside the bed, those need to be cleaned anyway. 

  
Just as he got under the covers he heard the crinkling of plastic and remembered the discarded bag of candies. He brightened, "I got you something," he murmured and held the small bag out to Newt who was watching him with sleepy eyes.

  
Newt took the bag with a smile, "You really shouldn't have... But thank you," he placed the bag behind him, "now come here," he held a hand out to Percival motioning him closer.

  
Percival took that hand and kissed the palm before sliding in; arranging himself so Newt can rest against his side comfortably. The weight of Newts belly has recently been a shock to his system, the realization that soon they would welcome a life that depended on them completely. The amount of responsibility required for this task was staggering and usually left Percival breathless every time he thought about it. He loved this baby already without a doubt and would never abandon them, but he was constantly plagued with doubts of his own aptitude, he's always been alone, he grew up alone, so how would he know the right thing to do by a child? 

  
Ever since they found out that a child was in their near future Percival has had these questions, but he's never voiced them, Newt didn't need that at this time and Percival wasn't planning or running away so there was no point to these thoughts... he just couldn't stop them from entering his head.

  
He was stroking Newt's back gently, thinking Newt must have fallen asleep, but Newt brought a hand to his cheek suddenly, Percival jerked in surprise slightly, "What's wrong?" Newt murmured.

  
"What do you mean? Nothing's wrong," Percival was confused at the frown marring Newt's brow.

  
"Your eyebrows are awfully angry. What are you thinking?" Newt's voice was light and soft, he wasn't annoyed or angry despite the frown.

  
Percival swallowed, tried to smile but it must not have conveyed the desired level of comfort because Newt started stroking his cheek in the way he did when Percival was upset and his frown deepened. "I'm just worried about you and..." he trailed off and put his hand on Newt's stomach.

  
Newt's frown loosened a bit, "We're fine, and I'll be resting more so don't worry about that," Percival nodded and stared at the blanket.

  
"Now what's really bothering you?" Newt basked gently, and Percival's gaze snapped up to him.

  
"Nothing, I'm I-" Percival's attempt to reassure was halted at a look from Newt. Yeah he shouldn’t have even tried to lie, not when he was talking to a master bullshitter. He looked away again, "I don't know if I'm going to be any good at this," his voice was hushed, afraid. He couldn't elaborate, couldn't say any more about this because he didn't know how and he wasn't sure he'd be okay if he tried.

  
Newt was quiet and Percival didn't want to look at him just yet, he didn't want to see if Newt was disappointed in him, for being weak, for doubting their family. The baby wasn't here yet and Percival was already failing, what kind of parent was he then.

  
"Do you trust in my judgment?" Newt asked suddenly.

  
Percival nodded, gaze still averted, he fiddled with the blanket covering his lap.

  
"And do you believe that I will be a good parent to our child?"

  
"Of course," he said urgently, he can't have Newt doubting himself because of Percival.

  
"I believe you will be a good parent too Percival, wait, let me finish," Newt brought his palm to cover Percival's mouth gently. 

  
Percival almost rolled his eyes but nodded for Newt to continue.

  
"You're a dedicated man Percival Graves and your sense of right and wrong is something I depend on," Percival raised his brows looking uncertain, "and I'm certain you would never do our child wrong on purpose and if you accidentally did you would fix it." Percival tried to argue again even through the muffle of Newt's palm. "No listen to me; do you know why I'm so sure of this?" Percival played along, pushed down his own frustration, and shook his head, "Because I've watched you for nine years and I've seen you do this almost every single day. You always do the right thing even in the smallest of ways. You help strangers, you're always there for our friends, and you even train new recruits at work just because you're asked to." Newt smiled.

  
"You have a kind heart beneath your grumpy exterior," Percival of course grumbled at that but was still muffled, Newt pressed on anyway, "I would not be having this baby if I didn't think we could both do it." Percival's breath hitched at that, at the sureness in Newt's eyes and voice.

  
After a few moments of quiet Newt removed his hand from Percival's mouth.

  
Percival licked his lips feeling deflated, eyes not meeting Newt’s, he tried to say something but he drew a blank. Newt must have seen how lost he looked because he just leaned in for a kiss, and another, and another. Any more talking would have been too much for Percival and he took the kisses gratefully.

  
A few minutes later Newt spoke again, "Have you eaten?" he sounded tired now.

  
"Yes, hey!" Percival got a painful jab to his chest for the lie.

  
"I know you haven't, you don't eat when you're worried. There's food in the fridge, heat some and eat. Then come back." Newt ordered him tiredly.

  
Percival rolled his eyes, admitted defeat and got up to have dinner quickly so that he can get back to his husband.

  
\- - -

  
The next day Percival felt wholly refreshed and hopeful, it showed throughout the day when Tina caught him whistling from his side of the station even though today they had to inspect a new set of upgrades on the synth’s and that was usually an unwelcomed change to the routine because they still had to learn about the new upgrade then inspect it.

His day was further improved as he received pictures from Newt, who was bored out of his mind apparently and decided that sending Percival a number of mundane things was the best kind of entertainment. There was a picture of Newt eating breakfast, one of Newt feeding Pickett, one of Pickett's nose that was too close to the camera, another of Newt trying on a very brightly colored jacket that he's never seen before, and a few more pictures of Pickett and also for some reason of Newt's feet. Tina’s curiosity at his boyish smiles led her to looking at the pictures over his shoulder and teasing him till the end of the day.

Percival's good mood couldn’t even be ruined when Theseus sent him a frankly offensive message, calling him a tattletale to start then devolved to cursing him out in other languages.

His spirits weren’t affected even by the regular news reports of terrorist attacks and the voice of the Chancellor calling for a stricter response, which usually grabbed his attention and placed a frown between his brows.

The apartment wasn’t dimply lit today when he got back and he smiled when he saw Newt sitting at the counter playing with Pickett, the sound of the news reports background noise in their home.

Newt welcomed him home with a radiant smile and quick kiss before he launched into a detailed report about how completely bored he was and how absolutely cruel it was to just sit home all day, and _couldn’t they please visit his animals tonight Percival, please_.

Percival, the secret sap that he was, agreed to take a trip with Newt to the sanctuary for a short visit, but only if it was absolutely clear that Newt’s back had recovered from yesterday’s strain.

They ate the dinner Percival prepared, Newt asking about his work and about Tina, and pursed his lips when he heard that there would be even more synth’s patrolling the streets of their island, regaling Percival once more with one of his tirades about the unfairness of automatically being treated like suspects by the UFB just because of where they were born or where they lived.

Percival agreed but he tried not to be loud about his opinions when it came to the UFB, his job there was what kept them in a moderately good apartment and not living under a sheet down on the streets. He also worried about Newt saying something where someone with bad intentions could hear; it wouldn’t do for Newt to be arrested, too many people, and animals, depended on him.

After dinner Newt relocated to the edge of the bed where he sat watching the news reports on the holoscreen and kept flipping between channels, absently petting Pickett. Percival watched him for a moment feeling overwhelmed with the press of feelings he had for this man. He was absolutely breathtaking in the best ways and Percival never wanted to be far from Newt, he wanted to drink in his energy every day, bask in his presence for the rest of his life.

Percival knew deep in his heart that he was under Newt’s command from the moment he met him; that if Newt said anything he would believe it not matter how preposterous; that if Newt told him to do anything he would do it. It wasn’t such a strange thing to him to be completely wrapped around one person; he’d been alone almost all his life before Newt and his friends barged in loudly, and when he realized that he liked their presence and that he enjoyed being around Newt most he knew he had already fixated on the enigma of a man.

Percival shuffled in front of Newt, blocking his view of their holoscreen and Newt looked up at him in slight confusion waiting for Percival to say something, but Percival could only kneel down in front of him and bring a hand up to Newt’s jaw, taking a moment to memorize his face.

Newt’s hand came up to hold Percival's wrist and asked if he was alright and instead of replying Percival simply stretched up for a kiss that left them breathless. Newt held Percival's face between his hands, their foreheads together, breathing together, and Percival suddenly didn’t want to be so far away, even when they were only a hair’s breadth apart. He would have been embarrassed at the needful sound he made if it weren’t immediately swallowed into Newt’s kiss, a deep searching thing. Newt’s tongue taking and taking, mapping out every inch of his mouth and Percival was considerably glad that was already on his knees.

Percival's hands moved across Newt’s body, everywhere he could reach, rubbing down his arms and gently stroking his belly, sliding down to his thighs, then Newt was pulling away to his alarm, and his hands were cradling Percival's face again, thumbs softly stroking his cheeks, “I’m not stopping you,” was the first thing Newt said because he knows, of course he knows, that Percival might feel like he’d done something wrong, even with seven years of marriage between them, his insecurities had flared from the moment they found out about the baby, “but you’re alright, yes?” his voice was as gentle as it was when he spoke to his baby animals.

Percival nodded without hesitation, breathed deeply, “I am. I just wanted… I want you.” He was glad to hear his voice sounded steady and not shaky and shy like he felt. There was no reason to feel shy with Newt, not now; they’ve reached the boring sex stage of marriage long ago and powered through it until they came out the other side victorious; sure they hadn’t done more than kiss heavily in a few months because Newt wasn’t feeling it, but it’s not like that meant he needed to automatically revert to the hesitant state he was in at the beginning of their relationship.

But Newt, the perceptive angel that he was, just smiled at him, blush high on his cheeks, and dropped a sweet kiss to his lips, “Good,” he pulled back and let go of Percival, “Could you arrange the pillows for me, I need to rest inclined for my back,” he motioned to the pillows behind him on the bed and Percival immediately went to form a small mountain against the headboard.

He’d only just helped Newt situate himself comfortably against the pillows when he was pulled into another deep and demanding kiss, Newt wasn’t going slow now, he wasn’t going to be easing into anything, he’d been at zero for months and now he was at a hundred. Newt was tugging incessantly at Percival's shirt and he only needed a moment to take it off before he was back giving Newt his full attention.

Percival kissed down Newt’s neck, biting and sucking marks along the way too, enjoying the breathy moans he heard and the tug of Newt’s fingers in his hair. “Get my shirt please,” Newt said with another tug at his hair and Percival helped him out of his shirt, and both of their pants too to save time. Taking a moment to himself, Percival stared at Newt’s big belly and softly stroked it, still not able to fathom that they made a baby and it lived in there, such a small thing, made up of both he and Newt, sitting right there under his hand waiting to come out. Percival bent down and placed a kiss or two to Newt’s belly, it was so close now, and the wait would soon be over. Newt let him have his moment and just stroked his back gently then Percival came back to him with renewed vigor, kissing, biting and moaning, “Spread your legs honey,” Percival whispered against his lips and Newt whimpered but complied.

He kissed his way down Newt’s chest down to his thighs and situated himself between Newt’s spread legs where he kissed and bit the soft skin for a few moments, driving him crazy, but he paid for it when Newt tugged on his hair, “Don’t tease Graves, it’s been months,” he demanded and Percival was powerless to refuse him. He took Newt’s length in his mouth and expertly brought him to the edge, licking over the head and sucking, compensating for the part he couldn’t reach with his mouth with his hand. He heard Newt gasp, then his moans got increasingly loud with every stroke and lick, his grip on Percival's hair tightening and loosening intermittently. Percival felt Newt’s thighs shake; a sign of his impending orgasm and Percival sucked his cock harder, determined to take him over the edge right away.

With a longer and louder moan Newt came right in Percival's mouth, grip tight in his hair. Percival pulled off his husband and cleaned out his mouth with a tissue he grabbed from the bedside table, not daring to try to clean Newt yet being so sensitive. Newt was still panting, head thrown back and sweat glistening on his neck and chest, he was the best thing Percival had ever laid eyes on.

He leaned in to place soft kisses along his throat and got some lazy hair petting for his trouble.

“Come here,” Newt voice was throaty and sent shivers down Percival's spine, not needing to be told twice, he shifted closer to Newt’s side, laying himself out on his side as he if was going to curl around his husband, he kissed Newt’s shoulder and kept mouthing at the skin he could reach while Newt brought a spit slicked hand down to Percival's neglected hardness.

Percival hissed and couldn’t help the first jerk forward; he keened loudly when Newt’s grip tightened and Percival pressed his mouth tightly to Newt’s shoulder. Bringing Newt off had taken him to a new level of sensitivity and he vaguely worried he would be easy in Newt’s hands, but the thought was driven from his mind when Newt started a steady pace and turned his head to kiss the corner of Percival's mouth. “I’ve missed you so much darling, I can’t believe it’s been so long for us.” Newt’s voice was sinfully low; dangerous, and Percival knew he was in trouble if Newt has decided to _talk_.

“Can you even remember the last time I had your cock in my mouth, or my hand, or my…” Percival keened loudly and arched his back, and Newt smirked; the little shit. “You know what I really miss Percy,” Percival tried to give him the stink eye for the nickname but failed, he just groaned pitifully, the pleasure spiking all over his body, “I miss fucking my sweet husband,” Newt said against his mouth and Percival whimpered, leaned for a kiss but Newt didn’t let their lips lock just yet, “I miss having you against the wall, and on the kitchen floor, and that wonderful time in front of the mirror, do you remember how beautiful you looked?” Percival couldn’t remember the mirror time but the image it brought to his head had him jerking in Newt’s hand and pleading softly against his mouth.

“I think that when I can see my feet again I’m going to bend you over our desk by the window there and fuck you again and again until you’re limping,” Percival squeezed his eyes shut and let Newt’s words drive him closer to the edge. “I’m going to make sure you’ve been thoroughly used Percival. That you’re not aching with emptiness anymore. I’ll have you begging me to keep taking you and using you over and over…” Newt didn’t have to go any further because Percival was already coming in his grip, shuddering and panting heavily, Newt patted his hair gently, his chest and shoulder.

Percival felt a kiss to his temple and he cracked open his eyes, his breathing growing less desperate; Newt was laying sweet little kisses all over his face, filling Percival with warmth. Percival brought Newt’s hand up and kissed his fingers, his knuckles, his palm, eyes still half lidded and face flushed, Newt only smiled warmly at him.

Before midnight they were both fast asleep.


	2. 0.2

* * *

 

 

One of his Newt Dreams seemed brighter than the rest, and Newt’s words sounded more than urgent. Percival still couldn’t remember what was said in the dream but this time the dream seemed less calm, shaky, and almost ripping at the seams with the force of Dream Newt’s words.

Percival woke up to Newt shaking him awake, a disturbed feeling settled low in his gut, quickly forgotten for the day, but slowly building up with each dream.

\- - -

The weekend brought Newt and Percival to the animal sanctuary, their friends already there and waiting for them to join the weekly gathering among the animals and creatures milling about. For once Newt reluctantly taking a seat as he instructed everyone else to cater to this animal or that, and only after all the animals were fed for the morning did the humans sit for their own breakfast, enjoying each other’s’ company.

Percival would never admit it in front of them but the best days for him are the days when they could all gather just to spend time together like this.

And even when they had no responsibilities the next day, Percival was out like a light long before midnight.

\- - -

“Wake up!” Newt sounded angry, “You’ll die here,” his body language was more pronounced and aggressive like he was reaching the end of his rope, and Percival desperately wanted to calm him down, take his hand tell him that it’s okay, but he didn’t.

This dream felt all kinds of bad. Newt was more fuzzy than usual even though the light above them was sharper and he was yelling and banging his fists on the table.

Percival didn’t understand why he was so angry or why he kept telling him to wake up. He would; ultimately when the dream ended as it always goes- Percival mused at being aware he was dreaming, but he supposed it must be because it was such a repetitive dream.

“Wake up Graves!” Newt snarled.

\- - -

Percival lay in bed for a few minutes, staring at the ceiling; he woke up before the alarm but not by too much. Newt’s out like a baby beside him and wouldn’t be up for some time yet, Percival won’t bother him, he knew how to be quiet in the morning. But he was staring at the ceiling this morning, lost in thought; he remembered what was said in the dream. Well, he remembered just the one phrase, but it was the one that Newt kept repeating at him, and each time more aggressively than the one previous.

_Wake up._

What a weird thing to be said in a dream.

Seemed like a pointless thing to say. But it’s not like dreams made sense anyway.

The alarm went off so Percival got up to start the day.

\- - -

One night Percival was restless and because of his tossing Newt was restless too, both unable to sleep. Newt sighed loudly and sat up in bed giving him a look.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just can’t sleep,” Percival blew out an aggravated breath.

Newt rolled his eyes, “Why? Are you by any chance carrying a child inside you that keeps kicking you in the bladder at all times?”

Percival sat up too, “Are you seriously still using that card?” gone were the days when such a tidbit from Newt would make him guilty for being comfortable while Newt was not.

“I’m allowed to use that card until the day I die,” Newt said imperiously.

Percival sighed and ran his hard through his hair tiredly and stared at the wall across from them, “I’m sorry I’m keeping you up, I don’t know why _I’m_ up.”

Newt was quiet for a minute, and then he started climbing out of bed.

Percival narrowed his eyes in confusion, “What are you doing?”

“Get up. If we’re not sleeping then we’re going to visit my animals, come on.”

“At this hour?”

“I’ve done it before plenty.” Newt was pulling on a thick jacket on top of his pajamas.

Percival puzzled but he was moving to obey anyway. He put on a jacket on top of his pajamas too and wore his boots.

When ready, the headed hand in hand to the sanctuary where Newt checked on a few of his ‘babies’ and any animal that was awake. Percival helped and he started to guess that maybe Newt just wanted to wear him out.

By the time they were done Percival sat on the ground with a sleepy dog in his lap and Newt perched on a chair next to him, they looked at the stars. The few of them bright enough to be visible.

“What time is it?” Percival asked quietly.

“Nearly two twenty,” Newt’s voice was hushed.

“Huh. We haven’t been up this late in a long time.” Percival mused, and Newt only hummed in reply.

They sat together quietly, Percival feeling his eyes drooping involuntarily; he thought he should tell Newt they should head home but his mouth didn’t cooperate and Percival thought it was funny because he couldn’t have been _that_ sleepy all of a sudden.

\- - -

Percival was yet again seated across from an angry Newt who kept yelling at him to wake up.

Which he did, in his bed at home, with Newt sleeping soundly beside him.

At the factory he suddenly remembered that he had no recollection of getting home last night and he tried hard to remember how they got home, or if he dreamed the whole trip to begin with.

He sent a message to Newt when he got nothing on his own.

_[How’d we get home last night?]_

_[what??]_

_[I can’t remember how we got home? or when?]_

_[why?!!] [we walked like usual. are you ok??]_

Percival blinked, feeling dread crawl up his throat. Why couldn’t he remember just walking home with his husband?! Was he that tired?

He didn’t think he was.

_[Percival?] [sweetheart where are you?]_

_[Work. Don’t worry I’m fine. We’ll talk when I get home. Don’t worry okay.]_

Percival spent the day absently worrying about it himself.

And when he got home Newt fussed over him, checking his temperature, checking for bumps on the head, and made him tea. Percival didn’t feel like there was anything wrong with him though.

\- - -

Over the next few days Percival deliberately stayed awake past midnight, yet he always felt incredibly tired by two-twenty and was out like a light three minutes later. Newt gave him weird looks but Percival always distracted him in the best way, then he’d sit wide awake looking at the clock.

He never made it past two-twenty.

\- - -

“You’ve got to stop this.” Newt said tiredly, standing close this time, no table between them, his voice clear, Percival can see his clothes, they look worn and messy, “You know this is wrong, in your gut you know. You’ve found the clues you just need to put them together.” Newt’s gaze in the dream is very intense this time around and Percival can feel his heart leap in his throat in fright. He’s never been afraid of Newt before, but in this dream, Newt has become increasingly angry, aggressive, and frightening, leaving Percival confused and gasping awake almost every day now.

“Have you looked in a mirror lately?” Newt’s tone switched abruptly, as if he asked about the weather. “I bet you won’t remember the last time you did.” He started walking a slow circle around Percival, his image getting fuzzier but his voice still clear.

“Do you know why you can’t stay awake past two-twenty?” Newt stopped again in front of him.

Percival gasped awake, it was very early in the morning, and leaned up on his elbows just for the sake of moving, of shaking off the claustrophobic feel of the dream. These dreams were starting to take the shape of nightmares.

He went to the kitchen, got some water and gulped down half a small bottle in one go. He stared at Newt’s sleeping form from his perch at the counter. These dreams no longer felt silly, they made him feel like he was backed into a corner, like he did something wrong. He stopped telling Newt about the dreams, no use upsetting him or worrying him when he was so close to the due date already.

Suddenly he remembered exactly the things Dream Newt had asked; the questions made no sense to Percival. Looking into mirrors, two-twenty AM, it sounded like his subconscious has finally snapped from stress and was trying to show him in a very weird fashion.

He shook his head, finished the water, and set the bottle down, he headed to the bathroom intent on looking himself in the mirror and getting rid of these thoughts so he could get a good night’s sleep.

\- - -

The next morning as Percival was inspecting his first synth for the day it hit him that he did everything he needed to do in the bathroom and yet forgot to look in the mirror.

And when he tried to remember just one time where he looked himself in the mirror, he came up short.

The dread that had pooled in his gut became more pronounced; unwilling to be ignored.

He walked out of the factory.

\- - -

Percival shuffled into his home, eyes distant, but frown firmly in place.

He found Newt at the kitchen counter, eating. Newt looked up at him in surprise, and then alarm, worry already etched onto his face, “Percival? What is it?”

Percival remained quiet for a few minutes, sat down on a stool beside Newt, and pulled out his glass phone, placed it gently on the counter-top in front of Newt, “Why aren’t there any pictures of us?” he said softly, eyes trained on Newt.

His husband’s confusion was clearly etched on his face, he definitely did expect such an innocent question with the way Percival must have looked.

“Of course there are, there’s hundreds.” Newt said sounding absolutely sure.

Percival shook his head slowly, “No. I even checked our network, there’s nothing with me in it, just you and everyone else,” he knew his voice started to get a bit strained.

“I’m sure they must have gotten lost or something…”

Percival kept talking, “And you know what else? Every time I decide try to look at myself in the mirror I suddenly forget to look, my eyes brushing over it and I don’t remember till long after. Also. _Also_ , I can’t stay awake past two-twenty in the morning, it’s like a switch inside my head,” he mimes flipping a switch, “and gone! And it’s all reset no matter where I am; I wake up in bed, safe and sound…” Newt had gotten quiet and was watching him with horror, “Now a normal person would just dismiss all this, but I just can’t Newt, something’s not right.”

Newt jumped in, “Sweetheart whatever it is that’s got you like this, we can fix it, I promise. I don’t care if you’ve gotten fired or something, we’ll make do. But the things you are saying make _no_ _sense_ Percival.” He said carefully.

Percival looked at him passively for a moment, “You know I don’t remember who the Chancellor is, or what he looks like. And I’m positive I asked Tina once or twice and she answered but I always forget.”

Newt was starting to look a little teary; he reached out and took Percival's hand in his, their rings close to each other, “I don’t understand, but please let me help. We have a future ahead of us Percival,” he sounded so helpless and it tore at Percival's heart, and Newt brought Percival's hand to his belly.

He let his eyes wander to where his child slept inside his husband, “I’ve never felt our baby move,” Percival whispers.

Newt sobbed once and bit back any other noise, “I don’t understand what’s wrong please tell me,”

Percival watched a tear run down his husband’s face and the pain of it drew him closer, one hand still on Newt’s belly, the other on his cheek, “Shh, it’s okay. It’s not your fault,” he said softly and swallowed thickly.

“What does that mean Percival?” Newt sounded so scared.

Percival could only lean in and press a kiss to Newt’s forehead, then to his lips, before sighing in defeat, “I think it means that, that you’re not real Newt, none of this is.”

Newt reeled back with a frown, “What?”

Percival nodded more firmly now convinced of his own words, “Yeah. You’re not real.  None of this is. It’s all in my head. I have to wake up now.”

Newt’s expression went from confused to sad slowly but he didn’t say anything else.

\- - -

Percival gasped awake.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who hates me? show of hands.  
> This turned out to be such an indulgent piece of trash!!! I don't know why Percival turned out like this with me. so hesitant, so lost, sad boy.  
> Kudos and comments can bring about a second part! Where actual issues can be addressed! And remember, criticism and yelling is always welcome!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Had to split it due to uncomfortable and very sudden style change?? i don't even know man this is just so badly written


End file.
